Tag Archives: judgement

Image of two great conversations and a smiling lady.

What’s really going on in a photograph – Part 2

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Have you ever had your photograph de-constructed?

 

Well why would you… unless you don’t like what you see?

 

What’s really going on in a photograph? Last year I wrote a blog on this subject to deconstruct what brings a photograph together. This broke down the various elements to explain why we don’t see beyond what’s directly in front of us. This is particularly relevant if you don’t like getting in front of a camera and think a poor result is all your fault.

If you haven’t already read it, I’m sharing a link to that blog again:

What’s really going on in a photograph?


It’s all about a good conversation.

 

Recent conversations brought last years observations to mind and worthy of adding another angle on the subject (pun intended). An image is essentially the result of a conversation, or communication between two parties. The success of the photo/s depends on the quality of that connection. Both sides of the conversation would like a good outcome that shows in the results, for their own agendas. But they both have to give the other something to achieve that.

Let’s assume for a moment that the technical side is all good and ok when capturing the image.

However, there still needs a good rapport going in order to get the engagement and guarantee great results. As in a normal conversation, if one always dominates and doesn’t consider or understand the others needs or point of view then the connection may not achieve the results you’d hope for.


Equate this to taking a photograph:

 

Person being photographed:

  • Do you feel comfortable with the photographer?
  • Do they talk you through the process and put you at ease?
  • Do they give you confidence, that enables you to trust you’ll get good results?
  • Do you feel out of control?

Photographer:

  • How closely do you observe your subject?
  • Do you know what you’re looking for and how to get it?
  • Do you start a conversation and keep it going?
  • Are you able to recognise if your subject is feeling anxious?


Let’s add another consideration…

 

This is not a professional shoot and someone has their phone camera out. This is traditionally where any conversation ends. There is also unlikely to be any guidance on the assumption you know how to stand/sit/smile. The photographer is intent on looking at their phone and before you know it… the photograph is taken. You are left with no idea how that image looks and perhaps a feeling of apprehension of its result. The photographer doesn’t see this through the same eyes as you.

If you express your feelings of “do we have to do this?” – it can be met with “you’ll be fine – don’t worry about it”.

So, you can now understand a bit more of what really goes on in a photograph, whether you are being captured, or, you are the one taking the photograph. If you want great results, start with great engagement with those you have in your camera site 🙂

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The YouTube channel continues to have things added to it. There will be another series of top tips soon, leading up to the Christmas period to help you when the cameras are out – Love Your Image on You Tube

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Woman wearing a suit of armour

Is judgement human nature or a choice?

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Is judgement human nature or a choice?

Sticks and stones can break my bones but words will never hurt me… or do they …? Cue the suit of armour!

We all do it, but we hate when it’s done to us.

Judgement is everywhere – we all have opinions on a lot of things throughout our lives.

Unless you’ve had a particular incident that you can relate back to, a fear of being judged is one of the biggest contributors for a dislike of being photographed.

It’s a frequent observation when meeting and working with new people in front of a camera. The apprehension and anxiety is visible. Until they realise there is no judgement or expectation for them to be anything else but themselves.

This ties in with the last blog regarding the values and expectations we learn from birth. It’s taken me years of my life to understand this. I work on changing things when I consider necessary, in my efforts to be a better human being… there, I’ve just made a judgement upon my own life.

Let’s look at what judgement or, to judge means.

We all have opinions on things – so is it when we share or verbalise an opinion that it becomes a judgement? That may depend on whether it’s referring to a fact, or, judgement being passed, as in a court of law. When it comes to speaking/posting a personal opinion about someone/group of people, are we aware of the impact it could have on their life?

The one thing you can be sure of… if you judge others, you in return will be judged.

Yes we have far more freedom of speech in the UK than some other countries. So perhaps some see it as their right to pass judgement? However, it doesn’t change universal law that what you give out, you will get back.

  • Have you ever considered reducing the amount you judge?
  • Refrain from verbalising an opinion a little more often?
  • Would it make you a happier person?
  • Would it change the dynamics of your relationships with others?

Who are we to pass comment on someone when we perhaps know little about them, or their life. Or how their day was panning out when you crossed paths with them? Is judgement only considered negatively, or can you have positive judgement?

All points to consider.

To change this in ourselves, we first need to understand why we do it.

Many of us live a life of comparison and trying to be what others expect, for fear of being judged. It’s born out of wanting to be accepted, liked, loved and to fit in. It takes, a lot of learning, self assurance, confidence and belief in yourself to feel comfortable NOT to do this. Reading that back, I’m thinking “Why would we do that to ourselves?” But we do.

How do we deal with judgement and what can we do about it?

We may not have control of what people say to us. But we definitely have control and choice of how think and behave when it’s dished out!

When we receive judgement, our initial reaction can be one of upset and hurt. You may feel you want to hit back and defend yourself. Please remember to keep this in context of a particular situation. But you can learn to realise, things people say, speaks much more about them, than it does about you. Judgement from one person, may be a compliment from another, according to their opinion. How many times have you heard an opinion being voiced? But it wasn’t asked for and was fairly obviously unnecessary.

It’s a challenge to keep our opinions to ourselves when others have been judgemental to us. Very often, it’s said in jest, or it can be followed up with “I was only joking”. If you’ve been following my blogs, I refer to an example I shared in ‘Photographer Responsibility – part 2’.

There is strength and power in knowing when to stay silent and when to respond.

Very often things others say stay with us, cause us to doubt ourselves, and question what we do and who we are. This is something some people will have endured for many years. It can cover all sorts of things, in every area of our lives. How we behave – even expectations in what we look like in our dress and style. It’s often most difficult to deal with if we are tired or feeling a little low.

What positive can come out of this? An individuals unique personality will always want to break through and be itself. You can start your journey of change to become who you want to be.
*** Awareness of ourselves is key to helping you on that path.

Being stronger to deal with judgement starts with ourselves.

Be kinder to yourself and stop giving yourself a hard time, it’s not a sign of weakness or giving in. If you feel you’ve made errors in the past, you were simply doing your best at the time. Judging others less will also reap its rewards.

So in answer to my original heading question. Is judgement human nature or a choice? I believe it’s a mix of both. Yes it’s part of human nature, but you do have a choice and can learn to deal with it. Start changing some lifetime habits. As I mentioned previously, it is essential for someone to feel they can be themselves when being photographed, without fear of being judged.

A date for your diaries 🙂 – this blog ties in perfectly with the event.

*** I will be one of the panelists at the ‘BE YOU’ event on April 28th 2023 in Bury St Edmunds at The Athenaeum. It’s all about driving change through conversation and support, to help you BE YOU. Do book your ticket and come along :).

Don’t forget, you can follow me on social media channels and check out and subscribe to the Love Your Image You Tube channel.

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Five half height photographs of a man. Varying poses.

What’s really going on in a photograph?

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I’m just not photogenic… or am I?

What’s really going on in a photograph? When we see an image of ourselves, we don’t see past it. We just see it as something perhaps we like or we don’t. If it’s one you like, great! But if it’s not, it can be part of a subconscious downward spiral to constant disappointment – leading you to believe you are not photogenic.

There are different reasons we do or don’t like an image.

But our decision will be based on a judgement about ourselves. Understanding a bit more of what’s happening in a photograph can be essential to helping you improve any dislike of an image. Not to necessarily like it, but to realise why it didn’t turn out so well – this doesn’t mean you are not photogenic!

A photograph captures a split second in time.

It brings together many elements. That single moment is all important to how you view the results. Let me expand on this slightly. We are producing expressions that are uniquely us, all the time, depending on where and who we are with. Because a photograph is of a single moment, it’s a skilled person who observes and captures you in an image that you will love. Not because you are a difficult subject, but because they know what it takes to capture that moment.

I’ve separated reasons into five main points and explained some of what was going on:

  • Photographer responsibility.
  • Technical issues.
  • Masking.
  • Comparing ourselves.
  • Judging ourselves

Photographer responsibility.

This was the topic of two earlier blogs – do take a read – Photographer responsibility Part 1 – Photographer responsibility Part 2. It could give you more insight. Who was taking the photograph? If you were captured either off-guard, or unexpectedly, perhaps the photographer wasn’t focusing on capturing you at your best, or, they didn’t know how to. Perhaps they didn’t consider how you were feeling.

Technical issues.

This was touched on in the last blog – again take a read – Using Phone Cameras and Filters – it could be helpful.

Don’t forget about the distortion that happens, if either you or someone else was capturing you on a phone camera. The camera may have been too low, or from a less than flattering angle.

The light was maybe harsh and unforgiving, perhaps because of bright midday sunlight, or, overhead artificial light. As I mentioned in the blog, people now assume that their phones will do it all for them.

Masking.

You’re requested to be in a photograph and beginning to feel anxious and uncomfortable and your stomach churns. You could also feel distracted and not know how to stand/sit/look and added to that you are not being guided. There’s no hiding at the back and you would rather not be there. So at best you grin and bear it, or put on a ‘mask’ to just get through. Tension, anxiety and feeling highly uneasy is going to show through.

These three points ARE NOT YOUR FAULT

But no-one else gives any consideration to this and leaves you berating yourself for taking a far from acceptable image, on the assumption it’s your responsibility – well it’s not!

The next two are deeply personal and individual.

Comparing ourselves to others.

Looking good in an image is actually not a competition, but many measure it this way. Social media and advertising pile on the pressure, causing us to think we should look like something/someone else. In reality, whether you can achieve it or not is another thing. We are lead to believe that if we buy a particular product, or have a particular treatment, we can! All to follow a particular trend and fit in with our peer group.

Judging ourselves.

I was recently chatting to a lady at an event about ‘Love Your Image’. She quite matter-of-fact announced that a particular lady (nearby) was beautiful and she (herself) was not. It was that black and white to her. How we see ourselves is of course deeply personal. Negative self judgement can be so ingrained, it’s barely a conscious thought or action anymore, as we do it so regularly. It has truly become a habit… a bad one. We’ve taught our brains, with our life experiences and values to automatically think that way.

So that’s the negatives covered – but all is not lost.

EVERY SINGLE POINT LISTED HAS A POSITIVE ASPECT.

Everyone can take a good photograph, yes everyone.

I once had a photograph taken to record quite a big achievement – I’d just cycled 100 miles in a day. I’d spent 3 months preparing and getting fit enough. It was a shot taken on a phone, (not mine), quite close up, so lots of distortion. I was also exhausted… it showed! 🙁  But the image doesn’t bother me, because I understand what was behind it.

I’ve shared an example to illustrate one of the above points – which point do you think these come under?

Group of people un-prepared for their photograph.

What’s going on in a photograph – this shows a group of people un-prepared for their photograph.

 

Happy group of people all smiling to camera

What’s going on in a photograph – a group all looking a lot more comfortable in front of the camera.

These two photographs are a perfect example of two moments in time, taken seconds apart – I remember them well, as I was there! As you can see, every single person in the group had no idea the photograph was being taken in the first image. The second is a much more pleasing image with everyone focusing towards the camera.

Do you relate to any of the points raised in this blog?

Did you know you can learn to get past all of these things?

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