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Five images of same women with different expressions

Positive and negative associations being photographed.

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What have positive and negative associations got to do with being photographed?

What have positive and negative associations got to do with being photographed? We spend much of our lives experiencing positives and negatives and what we do and don’t like. This can be in the things we choose to do and have to do. Perhaps, we’ve discovered a favourite holiday destination and some will choose to return to the same place regularly. It’s their happy place. We gravitate towards the things we enjoy by choice and strive to keep most of it positive and rewarding.

Some things may be more of a challenge to us for whatever reason. But often have to be done as a necessary aspect of achieving a more enjoyable life.

But what has this got to do with being photographed and seeing images of ourselves?

For many, we dislike the experience of being photographed as it reminds us of something really unpleasant from the past. It can be from childhood, or come from anywhere in our adult years. The resulting images just reflect that back to us with a negative reminder. It could be from a specific event, or just as commonly, a combination of learned behaviours and expectations.

Positive and negative associations being photographed – however, interestingly, we seem to remember the negatives more than the positives. So yes, you have positive associations from life. They are simply the things that don’t bother you in the least and you give them little thought. I’ll come onto these further on.

Referring back to my previous blog on “Body Parts in Photographs”. Lets take a look at a few general examples and how an association brought them to their current thinking:

‘I don’t like my teeth showing’

A child may have worn braces as a younger person and told to keep their mouth closed for a photograph.

“I hide my ears with my hair”

At school a child was told to tie their hair back and were teased about their ears.

“I want to lose some weight before I see you”

Weight is a common issue for many and may have been a source of negative comments. Or, we have learned by association through advertising and social media pressure that we should be thinner. This can lead to a challenge with self-esteem. It is further confirmed by the western culture we live in and the expectations placed on us.

Comments we have had from the past:

 

“You must have been beautiful when you were younger”

 

“You always ruined the photographs when you were a child”


Yes, sadly I’ve heard all of these and many many more.

So our current negative thinking towards being photographed can come from strong associations with things that have happened in our lives. In almost all instances, it was never your fault or responsibility. I refer back to another recent blog “What really going on in a photograph”

 

But as these are learned behaviours and associations, they can be changed.

I mentioned earlier that we also have positive associations. From my own journey, I have a list of both negatives and positives that shaped how I felt in front of a camera. Discovering this has given me power to my elbow (so to speak). It gave me the opportunity to target the things I wanted to change. It gave me the opportunity to reflect and feel good about the positives.

Fortunately society is beginning to change its thinking and attitudes and becoming inclusive to everyone, whatever, size, age, colour, culture, or sexuality. All the things that may have been cause of a negative association. This can also be a generational thing and take society quite a time to acknowledge.

There can be more complex areas of associations, but nearly all connect with how you felt at the time. So part of your journey to LoveYourImage can be identifying these negatives, understanding and changing them. 

Love Your Image also has a You Tube channel. There will be more recorded conversations coming soon, so make sure you’re signed up to the mailing list and be notified when new articles and videos are published.

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Five different photographs of a man standing

Body parts in photographs!

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I could have made this article sound like an autopsy, with a heading on ‘body parts in photographs’!


To some of us, a particular part of our anatomy can be a bit like ‘the elephant in the room’. When having a camera pointed at us, or investing in a photoshoot, it’s the main thing we focus on in a negative way.

It can be one thing, or several elements you fixate on and dislike.

Over the years I’ve heard and observed a wide variety of areas that get the ‘thumbs down’:

  • “No profile shots, I’m conscious of my nose”
  • “I have to hide my ears with my hair”
  • “I don’t like my teeth showing”
  • “What can you do with my lazy eye?”
  • “My arms are a bit fat”
  • “I want to lose some weight before I come and see you”
  • “Can you lose my chins?”
  • “My hair… (yes even this)”
  • “Can you photoshop my lines out?”
  • “I smile like a cheshire cat!”
  • “I have a scar…”

… the list is long and varied – but I get it, I know the things that I thought were my problem areas many years ago.

When people ask if I can ‘photoshop’ them in an image, my answer is this:


“I can, but then all I’m doing is agreeing that you’re not good enough without correction”. (I will be writing more on photoshopping in another blog). Please do remember, this is solely your opinion of yourself.

Without exception, you are great the way you are. But, I DO understand things that challenge you and am here to help you start that process of viewing yourself differently.

Some people fear being judged, or have indeed had this happen. It could have been from many years ago… it’s not pleasant.

TO EVERYONE –

All who know you, matter to you and love you, will accept you as you are.

TO EVERYONE –

Judgement says everything about the person who is dishing it out and not about you (Judgement is also the subject of another blog).

You may begin to observe that I refer to other blogs that have been written and future blog subjects that will be covered. These will always be relevant to what I’m getting across in the current article.

So let’s keep this relevant to the matter in hand. To begin the process that will help you, rather than removing an item, I work at taking away the focus from that element. This can help you have a completely different view on it. Yes it still needs to be part of an overall pleasing image in all other aspects.

It’s achieved by the lighting used, the angles used and the right communication with the person being photographed to capture your spontaneous expressions.

Let me give you some examples:


Where someones teeth showing is their challenge – to work with half smiles if often successful. To allow someone to keep their mouth tightly closed, just causes tension around the mouth and jaw.

Chins is a common one – one trick is to get someone to lean towards the camera a little. It does’t take much… too much lean and it will look odd. Very often if someone suddenly has a fit of laughter, it can cause them to pull their chin in… giving themselves an extra chin which they don’t normally have.

Let’s say someones right eye doesn’t open quite as much as the other. I don’t like using the term ‘lazy’ as this makes it sound quite derogatory. Turn the right side of the face slightly towards the camera, have the camera a little above the subject, causing them to naturally look up towards the lens. This can often open that eye a little more than normal.

Facial lines – by flooding the face with light, without removing all shadow. Shade context gives your face shape and the unique expression that is you. This can either be using the right studio lighting, or finding the right natural light source. This can also apply to scars.

I can’t stress enough that adjustments in position, angle, height, light, really don’t need to be too much to achieve effective results. As already mentioned, the success is also in your spontaneous expression achieved by the communication with your photographer.

This blog brings a little insight to part of the process of helping you accept the tremendous individual that you already are.

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Don’t forget there is also a You Tube channel, with a growing number of ‘recorded conversation’ with people who are experts in their field and their subject has a close connection with the concept of Love Your Image

strip image showing four headshots of the same woman and someone holding an iPhone camera.

Using phone cameras and filters…

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It’s great, I can do everything on my phone… or can I? 

It’s time to talk about the cameras most of us have.

The cameras we have on our phones and how we use them. Technology moves on at an incredibly fast pace, and has brought us so many new and convenient ways to communicate in different areas of our lives. Latest tech can be innovative and helpful, but can also bring new challenges. Let’s open up a few of these things and the positive and negative effects they bring in using phone cameras and filters.

Camera phones are built to make it easy – just open your camera app, point and shoot. If you have no knowledge of how cameras operate, this sounds fabulous. But when you don’t get the results you hope for – it’s frustrating, or, disappointing! I’m also generalising on the different phone models that most of us have and what we find happens. Some phones are better than others and the newer models are always adding features to improve them.

Differences in how camera phones and a full frame DSLR capture your likeness.

One of the main things is distortion.

You take a selfie and think “do I really look like that!”. I’m not going to get technical, but look at the comparisons I’ve used to illustrate, of my own selfies. The first was taken close up and personal the second at arms length. There is still distortion on the second, but not as noticeable as the first. Now if you dislike what you see in an image of yourself, this can be an issue. So, no that’s not what I truly look like!

Close to the camera selfie

Example of distortion in a selfie

Selfie taken at arms length

Distortion is still there, but less when held at arms length.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It’s a point worth remembering when you take a selfie, all you can achieve is to minimise the effect.

The angle and lighting – this can make a difference.

We all have different shape and contours to our face and bodies – it’s what makes us unique, individual and beautiful. The light and angles in a photograph, can display that individuality in different ways. It can be flattering and forgiving, contrasting and artistic, or, cold, hard and unforgiving. If you’re taking the photograph, you have control over this … with a little knowhow ;).

So it’s not about you being ‘photogenic’, there’s a lot more going on that has an effect on this, that’s not your fault!

By the way, going back to the subject of distortion, the angle you hold your camera at yourself, can have a marked effect on distortion. Yes this can be used in a creative way, but can also accentuate or detract from a nice selfie.

Take a look at the header image. 

The second one is too dark, because of bright light behind me and the third is a very poor angle from too low down – quite unflattering!

Using Filters…

The fact that we all have cameras on our phones and quick access to social media platforms, has brought about filters.

I’ve used a couple of images of myself, taken a while back to illustrate a little of what I mean. I’ve intentionally put them before and after – meaning, the first has been filtered, the second – filters are removed. I don’t want filters on me, I’m perfectly ok without them. I want people to be able to see, as close as possible, the real me – the one they would see when they meet me.

A portrait photograph with filter applied.

An example using a filter.

An unfiltered portrait photograph

An example without using a filter.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Understanding exactly what’s going on in a photograph and why one might look a bit more pleasing than others is the subject of the next blog. “But you’re a photographer, so you would know” – yes but I wasn’t always confident in front of a camera – I’ve learned how to be and the reason why I created Love Your Image to be able to help others.

It may be quite fun to apply stars, butterflies, big eyes and puppy ears, and yes, the positive benefit of using a filter to improve colour, contrast or light level is fine. I started this blog with “It’s great, I can do everything on my phone…”. But filters have taken on a much more sinister and challenging effect, when used to change our appearance… your eye, lips, face, everything. Search on google for Snapchat, Instagram, and TikTok filters… beauty filter, goddess filter, movie star filter, … the list is endless. The fun and helpful element is one thing, but when you see the endless comments on the negative effect the trend for filters is having… it’s time to speak out.

SHOULD WE HAVE THEM AT ALL?

These all create something different to who we really are. I’ve seen it suggested that they achieve unrealistic perfection. We can agree that we are all unique and individual, otherwise we’d be clones. So there is no bible or manual out there that says one person is perfect and another isn’t? Is this really just saying ‘I’m not happy with what I look like without a filter?? When people meet you face to face, you’ll look nothing like they imagined.

So remember, when you see others on social media who seem to have very smooth skin, even light and big doe eyes, they have likely applied filters. What you are seeing is actually not real!

I’m going to leave this blog on a note to watch for the future – the rise of the ‘metaverse’ – for all it’s helpful aspects, will this be the next body dysmorphia challenge to humans?

If you’re not already on my mailing list, don’t forget to sign up and receive your free tips sheet. That way, each time a new blog or video is published, you will get to hear about it… yes, there is now a You Tube channel for Love Your Image – do take a look and subscribe if you’d like to be kept up to date 🙂 

Five headshot images of a woman in a row.

Five steps to stress free photographs

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How many times in your life has someone said to you “take it one step at a time”?

There are many relevant points on what it takes to be at ease in front of a camera. However this article shows just how easy it can be to get there, by following my five steps to stress free photographs. I’m not just talking about working with a professional photographer, I’m also talking about any time you find a camera being pointed at you.

Some of us need a goal or an incentive to step out of an uncomfortable place.

When we do, we grow personally ending up mighty pleased with ourselves and a feeling of real achievement 🙂

Imagine this analogy – the place you’re in now, with regard to being photographed, is like standing on a river bank. It’s familiar, but you want to be on the other side, because all the things you’d like to have, do or be, are over there!

You’ll get on with life in the same format that you always have. You tell yourself that you’re fine where you are, or it’s too dangerous to cross the deep water.

But you are always given a way forward when you decide you want to change something.

Finding someone to help you on that journey makes it a lot easier:

They show you how to step forward
Guide you through
Give you the tools to find your way

One step at a time can get you across to a better place on the other side of that river.

Analogy of the river

Analogy of the river when taking things one step at a time

Imagine the river has stepping stones – you can choose to take a first step and see the journey ahead. You have the option to go back, but you can’t move onto the next stone until you’ve achieved the goal of the one you’re standing on. So you always have a choice. Here are your five steps to stress free photographs.

Step 1

Is all about acknowledging where you are now and being ready to take that next step.

Step 2

It’s a bit like a ‘Photo-less Photoshoot’! We explore all the issues that affect people; identify and discuss which apply to you and discover insightful information and technique for you to move forward – no photography takes place!

Step 3

‘The safety net step’ – go through the motions and methods of working in front of a camera, BUT, no photographs are taken. It might be possible to move across step 3 quite quickly, but it’s there as a safety stone if you need it and a valuable part of your journey 😊

Step 4

Armed with information and control, using all you’ve learned so far, you ease into a photoshoot. We discuss the results and how you feel and re-cap on your available strategies to use for the future.

Step 5

Reaching the far bank and a stronger place, celebrating, and receiving your images.

When we really want to learn a new thing or change something in ourselves, without knowing where to start – it can seem like a wall right in front of you. All we see is the insurmountable task of getting past it and the stress and anxiety that brings. You can turn and look the other way, but it doesn’t get you past the wall. When someone helps you stand back and see a different picture, full of possibilities, things you probably haven’t thought of, it opens up a world of potential.

Life is not always as it seems – you always have a choice – you always have a way forward and that brings you control and confidence.

Having a free review is your first step – get in touch and you can find out more – Love Your Image 5 step success.

In the meantime, do sign up to the mailing list for Love Your Image and stay up to date with new information and blogs. There is also a You Tube channel – you get to know when a new video is published by being on the mailing list.

Proof of your success

Proof of your success through five steps to stress free photographs.